one more.

Can't help myself.

umpqua.

I don't know what the word means, but the Umpqua River area is undoubtedly one of the most beautiful places I've ever been in my life. It's in southern Oregon on your way over the great Cascade divide, meaning that it's lush and beautiful and full of plant diversity.

My good friend and fellow plant nerd Jennie took a drive out to a tiny town called Glide, which hosts a huge wildflower show each year. They boast over 600 species of plants, mostly wildflowers, and have some other fun displays. All the plants are labeled, many with little range maps. The vast majority don't grow where I live in the high desert, so it's even better to get to see them in person. They also sell pie, which I was pretty excited about. Unfortunately it wasn't very good pie. And I like pie.

The show brings in over 700 people PER DAY of two days! Unreal. Our Wildflower Show brings in 400 people over 3 days - pathetic. The Glide Show, however, has a 40ish-year reputation and most visitors, I would wager, are repeaters. Over all? An awesome time. The women running that show do one hell of a job and I'm looking forward to visiting again.

There were so many beautiful flowers to see. I'll post a few favorites here.

It was a great show, especially for a suggested donation of $3. It gave me tons of ideas for our own wildflower show, which I spent all day today accumulating into a big list. Here in Central Oregon we only manage to gather about 100 or so species of wildflower, but a local botanist told me that's pretty good for our area. After a stop at the local restaurant, Jennie and I did a smidge of exploring. 

 

Above left: a cool viewpoint where two rivers clash together in the summer. Above right: the incredible North Umpqua River. I just realized the two photos look almost the same, but...I swear they're at different location. Below: Don't you just want to drink that green water? Up on the huge rock formation, these incredible bowls of water host quite a bit of wildlife, such as this caddisfly and these tadpoles.

The last thing I'll leave you with is the incredible blue camas. Pathetic in these photos, the blue and purples of this star-shaped beauty is other-wordly. It's also one of mankind's good friends: the bulb is a famously tasty wild edible (maybe with a little seasoning), and was integral in the survival of local First Peoples tribes. Tribes would make huge events of collecting the blue camas, as it grows in enormous meadow patches in some areas. I tried digging out a bulb, but it was buried beneath the rocks. Defeated, (I had REALLY been wanting to try camas), I nibbled on the bottom of the stem instead. Verdict? Delicious. Delicious AND beautiful. I think I'm in love.

IMPORTANT NOTE

Blue Camas can easily be confused with Deadly Camas when not in flower. Deadly Camas has white blooms and, as its name suggests, can kill you if you ingest it. Never, EVER eat any kind of Camas unless you can positively identify the plant. In fact, don't eat wild edibles until you're positive you can identify any of them. Thanks. :)

shameless.

This post is really nothing more than a shameless plea for you, the reader, to leave feedback. I only keep this blog for three reasons: to connect to friends & family, to connect to complete strangers who share my ideals, and to keep a semi-log of things I do with my life. I can do that last one in a book that no one else gets to read, but I LIKE connecting to other people.

Now, I've noticed that my blog gets 10-15 new hits every other day or so and yet no one leaves any feedback. I'm considering tossing the blog since it takes up a lot of time and I'm not really making that connection I want to make. So this is my shameless plea, asking you to leave comments about whatever my posts bring up for you, or at least to (like it) or (respectfully disagree).

I know. It's shameless. But I'm okay with shameless at this point in my life. In fact, shame distracts entirely too many people from enjoying their lives. I've also found that sometimes, when you get the courage, saying what you need or want gets you exactly that.

So. Please?

And, thanks.

springtime prep.

Well, anyone who says Central Oregon never gets any rain obviously has never lived here for an entire year. Spring is a season of serious precipitation (can you say that 5 times fast?) - in fact, I like to ponder just how much water one could collect with the right size container. And how much drinking water one could glean from collecting all this precip with the right filtration system?

At any rate, our barrels are full and our gardens are getting a ton of water. My bitterroot is about to burst into bloom, and several plants that I was sure I killed are leafing out, including two (small) golden currants and two serviceberry shrubs. Also, my little sticky geranium has resurfaced! (This is mostly exciting because I'd forgotten I'd planted it.)

A friend of mine built two triangular garden beds out of scrap wood for me, which, I think, makes our little cement patio look a million times better. I'm not sure what will go in them but I'm thinking a hardy succulent/cactus garden in one and perhaps an herb garden in the other.

Finally, I have taken the plunge this year and planted potatoes. A friend at work gave me some lovely little heirlooms that grow like weeds on the west side of the mountains and they've gone into a huge tub I purchased at a thrift store for a few dollars.





Needless to say, I am READY for this gardening season!

righteous rage.

Behind our house sprawls many acres of undeveloped land. It's slated for roads and a sub-division, but for the last year we've been reaping the benefits of a slow housing market and the land has served, instead, as a little forest to explore with the dog. For whatever reason, tall grass is like cocaine to my canine companion and when he gets back there, he simply runs laps around me. After half an hour, his tongue is lolling obscenely out of his mouth, his ears are half-perked in a mischievous state, and he's exhausted with joy. In the middle of the night, I've heard Great Horned Owls hooting, there are Mule Deer and families of quail hiding back there, and Erin has even heard coyotes.

Well, that may all be over.

A week or so ago, the machinery of destruction moved in. Bulldozers, dump trucks, and some crazy, huge, driveable jackhammer are just a few of the pieces of mobile equipment lining up back there. From about 8am until 5pm, Monday through Friday, they drill, doze, and blast. The current project, from what I understand, is a sewer pipe. I have no idea how long this is supposed to go on for, and I don't know if this is just a one-time installation or if greater development will follow on its heels. But it sure has me thinking. (And Sunka has certainly not been himself, having been subjected to that noise all day while I'm at work - not to mention the blasting that shakes the house like an earthquake.)

Watching that giant jackhammer slam into the earth was like watching some kind of public rape. The diesel fumes flow into the house if I don't keep the back door closed. All the yellow and orange hurts my eyes. I miss looking at the trees; now I have to look at them through the metal. This morning, I really had to fight the rage. It's really like we'll just never learn. People in this town can't afford the houses that are for sale, and yet we just keep making more. More, more, more buildings and less, less, less space for the other living things. No one asked permission from the earth, no one thanked the earth, no one even thought about the earth. They just started ripping Her apart, jamming pipes into her, and tearing up her plants. (If this is all a bunch of woo-woo to you, feel free to piss off now, because it won't get any better and I won't apologize for it.)

I guess to be honest, I don't really know what they're doing or if this noise will continue. Maybe it will, maybe it won't. In the meantime, here's a little photo montage of the beautiful trees back there. At least if they get mowed down, they'll be remembered in photos. I also collected a jarful of pine cones from the incense cedar. The way I see it, humans and trees are really forever connected. Without trees, we wouldn't be able to breathe. Without trees, our ancestors wouldn't have survived without heat in the winter cold and with which to cook our food. We'd also be living in mud huts. Trees have shaped who we are as a species as much as dirt, air, and water have. They could use a little more respect from us.

Incense cedars (the reddish bark and strange looking pine cone clusters) are the trees that make those delicious-smelling cedar boxes. Then there are the junipers, some birch (I think that's what the white-barked tree is), and a beautiful aspen, the truth tree (you'll notice it's 'eye'). Many of them have white rings of paint around them. Is this a life sentence or a death sentence? I don't think that I actually want to know.

Then, amidst all this sadness in my heart,  I came across this post in the ground. It was painted some green color but had degraded to teal, with some of the original wood showing through. Despite the staples and its utilitarian purpose, it struck me as utterly beautiful. I am always reminded that for all mankind's ugliness, we can create beauty; even if accidentally. A hawk soared above to remind me to keep perspective in life.

It's not always easy.

My job rules.

So I work at this little Nature Center where I'm responsible for animal care, teaching kids (and adults) about natural history, and a variety of other projects. I really can't tell you more clearly how I feel about my job than this: I love it.

We have a whole host of reptiles and amphibians (collectively know as herps), and four birds of prey (raptors) that cannot be released back into the wild. I get to work with some of the birds as program birds and also get to help out when an injured raptor comes into the Center. For many people locally, we're the first thing they think of if they see an injured animal.

This is Jay, our resident biologist (and all-around-coolest-old-guy-on-the-planet), wrapping the broken wing of a red-tailed hawk. The bird's face looks a little funny but that's because he is actually biting Jay's hand in this photo. Getting bit sucks but it's nothing compared to getting slashed with their unholy talons. You'll notice in this photo that the hawk's talons have been wrapped with tape to prevent injury to humans. (The tape comes right off and doesn't bother their little toes at all.)

I also get to watch our gopher snake eat every week, which, for some reason, never gets old for me. On the other end of the herp spectrum, here are some Spotted Frog (candidates for the endangered species list) eggs, just chilling in our little lake. Sweet.  

And, as a last photo for this completely random entry, we have the evidence of a mink kill. Yes, I said mink kill. We have a resident mink that lurks about the property, starting general mischief and consistently avoiding the prying cameras of both employees. Here, the mink had nabbed a flicker and took it under an overturned boat to eat it. So cool.

The Life Binder (DIY "Craft" #2.)

If you're like me, you collect small bits of paper and stacks of magazines because, you suspect, somewhere down the road you'll need them. Or want them. Mostly, you'll just want them. Maybe you hate getting rid of ticket stubs. Maybe you can't part with a magazine because it has one or two articles (or photos) that you really love. Maybe you take the next step and tear out those articles, and triumphantly throw the rest of that magazine into the recycling bin.

Now you have your four sheets of paper...that don't fit into ANY OTHER file, folder, envelope, or category of crap in your home. In fact, if you're like me, you probably are a closet collector of these sheafs. Maybe you throw in the occasional paint chip, funny photo, or cut-out of something-from-a-catalog-you-want-but-will-you-ever-buy-it?-who-knows.

If you do any of this, then you're definitely like me.

Solution? The Life Binder.

I literally had a stack of shit just hanging around and finally got fed up with it. Go to Target, a thrift store, or your garage and find yourself a binder. (If you collect a lot of scraps like me, aim for a binder that's larger than 1".) Make sure it's pretty, and if not, paste some of the crap you've been collecting (but probably will never use for that scrapbook or "gift" for someone else) all over it. Make it fun, like your personal Bible, that you'll return to often. You can hole punch, or, for more protection, purchase a box of plastic sheet protectors. I say a box, because, well, you'll be surprised at how fast you run out of them.

Here's my Life Binder (scary how it matches my sofa):

It's lovely, simple, and I now I LOVE saving scraps of crap (whereas I used to feel overwhelming guilt because my poor girlfriend had to see the stacks lying all over the house - and I looked like a hoarder). My binder contains postcards that I buy and have no use for (I certainly can't send them, they're too sentimental), scrapbooking pages in colors that I love, newspaper clippings, and now, for the most part, articles & photos that I tear out of DIY/home decorating magazines. (Yay for cutting down on all those magazines!) Also, clips of things from catalogs that one day I might buy but in the meantime I can think about making my own version. (Right. See, I don't make this stuff up.) Furthermore, bits of poetry and short stories that have nowhere else to live, but in the LIFE BINDER!

I know this is a little silly, since we're all adults and, well, we don't need to be told to go buy a binder and put all our shit in it. The thing is I never really thought about it until I bought this binder with no plan for it (just loved the colors and it's made from recycled paper) and when I got it home, realized there was a perfect solution to my piles-around-the-house and glares-from-my-girlfriend. Sure, you could make a scrapbook, but, really, this is so much less work. :)

Thanks for reading! 

DIY craft #1

Here's a fun craft I thought I'd post for you ladies (or men!) out there that have a lot of earrings. Many of us succumb to the terrible habit of throwing them into a bowl or a box, where they get tangled or forgotten about. I started making these canvases in part to display and protect my investment (most of my earrings are handmade by Etsyians or myself), but also because I absolutely love to have more fabric in every room. These canvases are a great way to get a splash of your favorite fabric into a room, whether you want to put earrings on them or not.

Materials needed: 
a canvas or thick, wooden photo frame (preferably from the thrift shop, where they are abundant and cheap), sized for however many earrings you need space for
your favorite fabric (the more busy a fabric is, the less emphasis will be on your earrings, so decide if you want it to be more about the fabric or your jewelry)
canvas or other thick fabric (unless you're using a ready-made canvas)
upholstery tacks (or a staple gun - makes it way faster/easier, I just like the look of the tacks)
tack hammer or regular hammer
potentially a pair of pliers if staples need to be removed
(Note: You can definitely use a staple-gun for this project as it makes it go a lot faster, but there's something really fun for me about using the upholstery tacks and having all of the labor be completed without a gadget. If using a staple gun, just make sure you have staples that are short enough for your frame!)

1. Assemble your materials. If you're using a canvas, leave the canvas part on the frame. If you're using a picture frame, discard everything except the wood itself. Remove and staples or other uglies so that you're left with a clean frame.  If you're using a picture frame it may already have a hanger on the back, but if not you'll have to purchase some and put one on yourself. (Or, you can just hang the frame evenly on a nail and not even worry about it.)

2. Iron your fabrics and cut them to size. Both pieces should be the length & width of your frame, PLUS another few inches. This is to cover the thickness of the frame and so that you can fold a neat hem. Measure how much you'll need and cut it with a pair of sharp scissors (preferably fabric scissors).

3. Lay your top fabric face-down on a sturdy table. Lay your canvas-y fabric down over that. Place your frame in the center. Starting with any side, fold the edge of the two fabrics about a half inch or so, then over again. Be sure that your fabric is even when you lay it over the edge of your frame so if there's a pattern on your fabric it won't be all cock-eyed.

4. Whilst holding your "hem" in place, tack your first tack into the center of that side of the frame. Adjusting for straight-ness, place your next tack in the right corner, then one in the left corner. In the photo you'll see fancy upholstery tacks and regular flat-head tacks. I just had both laying around, so I used the fancy ones for the corners and centers of the frame arms and the flat-head ones to fill in once the whole thing's done.

5. Fold in the corners however you like. Folding it some ways will make the edge stick out, some ways will keep the edge hidden. It's up to you, but I prefer to fold the corners in so they don't stick out. To do this, fold the edge down so it runs along the frame, then "hem" the most outside edge and fold that up over the corner piece you just folded over. Tack in place at the corner, then do the other corner. Finish by tacking the center down. To be perfectly honest, it's hard to describe this process so it's just going to take some experimentation for you to get it the way you like.

6. Make sure that as you're going around the frame, you're pulling the two fabrics nice and taut. This will keep your fabric from sagging and hold your earrings in place better.

7. Finish tacking all the way around the frame. You'll find that you'll still be able to pull the in-between-tack areas of fabric tighter, so do so before filling in those areas with tacks. Your end product will look something like this:

8. You can add your earrings a few different ways, but what I like to do is just take a sharp thumbtack and carefully poke it through both layers of fabric. When you place the earring into the hole, you may notice that it doesn't go right through - sometimes the fabric shifts, but if you just move the earring around gently, you'll find the hole in the canvas layer. Be creative with your hole placement - you can move along the pattern of the fabric or make geometric shapes. Just leave yourself room for the long danglies and the not-so-long danglies.

Extras for Fun: I like to make a little pocket and tack it onto the bottom side. I use my pocket for the earring backings so I don't lose them, but this blue and brown piece has a pocket for my friend's business cards. I also always tack a length of chain onto the bottom as well, for those earrings that have leverbacks and can't just push through a hole. You can see the finished piece below, along with my personal earring holder (with a beautiful fabric by Joel Dewberry).

Have fun and be creative! :) Thanks for reading!

Etsy!

Just an FYI, my Etsy shop is finally "up and running." I have a lot more stuff to put up, but it's going to be a process. Go here to see my whole 5 listed items. :) I need to revamp my banner and avatar (the little box next to my information) - I am really partial to the chicory flower but I dislike the banner more and more whenever I look at it. We'll see what I can come up with.

In other exciting news, my friend Danielle and I have scored a sweet deal in Sisters (a little town about 18 miles north of here). This beautiful little gallery called DonTerra, run by a wonderful lady named Teri, is going to be displaying my art quilts and Danielle's earrings. DonTerra is a three-(huge)-room gallery that sells the work of local artists. Teri has an incredible range of items, from carved-wood furniture to paintings, jewelry to ceramics, glass work to hand-knit scarves. She also helps new artists get their start, as many galleries won't consider your work unless you've already shown it elsewhere. For people like me and D, this is a great opportunity as Sisters gets thousands of visitors throughout summer.

Needless to say, this is keeping me and D pretty busy. It's exciting, but I'll be glad when everything is said and done and our stuff is on the wall. Then I focus more on my Etsy shop. I really want it to be a successful little shop! All crafters dream of making supplemental (or sole!) income with their goods...

deep thoughts require immediate action.

So this morning I'm shuffling around like a zombie because, for the last two or three weeks, I've been having dreams so intense and so vivid that I wake up in the morning feeling hungover. (And they don't make any sense to me. For example, this morning before I woke up, I was dreaming about cleaning a toilet bowl but it wasn't really a toilet bowl, it was like a giant stone toilet bowl with rocks and little fish in it, and the fish were little flat flounder-looking things and they had awesome camouflage and they would swim up to the top of the water and take a giant gulp of air before returning to the floor of.. well, the toilet bowl-thing. I mean, really? I couldn't just dream about winning a million dollars or having sex with Johnny Depp?)

At any rate, I'm a part of this incredible project with an artist named Teafly (you can check her out here). She's interviewing and photographing 20 people in Bend that are part of the LGBTQ community or allies. So she's gotta come take photos of me and I'm finding that deep down inside, that makes me uncomfortable. Not because I don't want to be a part of the project visually or because I'm afraid of Joe Schmoe finding out that I'm a bisexual, but for one other, awful, awful reason.

I kind of think I'm fat.

Now, before you go on with your "the media is evil" or "you're obviously stupid" train of thought, let me finish. The thing I realized this morning (which is, really, a miracle considering that only the part of my brain controlling bodily movement is working properly) is that our brains work on two levels: the conscious and subconscious. Now, consciously, I love myself for everything I am. I don't think I'm "fat", I think I'm "out of shape." In whole, I try to identify myself with the Goddess, who had some chub on her anyway.

That's where the subconscious comes in. For whatever reason, I really bought into that media bullshit my whole life - fat people are wrong, fat people are bad, fat people don't deserve love, etc. There's this tiny, evil seed somewhere in my brain that continues to feed me these messages when I'm not paying attention, despite the fact that, consciously, I don't believe them or agree with them.

After a life-changing conversation with my best friend about race and racism (she's black and I'm white), she indirectly pointed out the same thing about racism. There are lots of things that people don't believe about race, but because the textbooks and the good old boys and the media are still feeding us white-privilege propaganda, people still say and do racist things all the time. I'm saying this because, via this conversation, I found out that I've said some pretty racist stuff to her over time. I wasn't trying to hurt her *consciously,* and I sure as hell didn't believe that she was any less than me, but there was some subconscious seed floating around that was feeding me the story that black people are less than white people.

Look, the point is, the only way to rectify the subconscious with the conscious is to start talking to people and looking at yourself. When a thought pattern is detrimental to you and those around you, take a serious look at it, despite how afraid you may be of it. Try as best you can to dig those seeds out of your brain; chances are, you didn't put them there yourself. We operate under these outrageously stupid constructs designed, mostly, by the small gang of older white men that have been running this country for so long. Skinny girls with big boobs, black people stuck behind the counters of fast food joints, Mexicans being taken back to Mexico, you know how it goes.

In my last post, I mentioned turning off the news for good. This is a good reason why. Now, Teafly is going to take my photo. And what am I going to do about it? Make every attempt to look at the situation as an opportunity to plant a seed that many of us struggle with our whole lives: the seed of complete self-acceptance and love. What are your seeds? Which ones do you need to get rid of? Which ones have you planted yourself?

Thanks for reading. :)